One of my favorite activities with friends is going shopping. Not all extroverts love shopping, but I think it can be a popular favorite activity. There are lots of things to explore in stores—textures, colors, shapes, sounds, all sorts of fantastic things! I’m almost always entertained by the mall mannequins for some reason. Stores almost always have some new thing available as well. It may be related to the season, or it could be related to an event, like the release of a new movie. Whatever it is, you can be sure that each time you visit a store there’s going to be something different.

Most of the time, I feel energized when I shop, even if I’m by myself (unless it’s an antique store. I don’t like those). Shopping with friends can make things even more fun. Now I’m not only dealing with all the excitement from just being inside the stores, I now have an incredibly complex being to join me in my adventures. They will have different preferences, different opinions, and a different perspective on things. They will probably also have some similarities to me, which can be very affirming and validating.

The only issue now is to avoid spending too much on a single shopping trip. Since I live further away from the city (where there tends to be more opportunities for shopping) I also have to worry about gas money. This is why I prefer to do window shopping. Window shopping carries all the excitement that comes with normal shopping, except you save a lot of money. This is because, with window shopping, you don’t buy anything at all!

Another word for window shopping is browsing. Both mean just looking at stuff in the store and not necessarily buying anything you find. Everyone does their browsing in their own unique way, but I’m curious if certain browsing methods might come more naturally to certain types of extroverts. Here are my thoughts about the browsing style of each of the extroverted functions, Ne, Se, Te, and Fe.

Ne (Extroverted Intuitive) Browsing

Bicycle. Hanging lamp things. Blorbs of many colors.

Ne users may be more excited by the idea or potential of an item, rather than about the item itself. This can make browsing more entertaining, in some ways, since one can imagine beyond just things in the store. As many dominant Ne users would probably say, the possibilities are endless! Halloween or Christmas decorations can inspire loads of possibilities, but so can aisles that are simply full of yarn, stickers, fabric, tools, or even Legos. A Lego-themed Christmas that’s also decorated with yarn… and now they want to buy the whole three aisles of stuff. This can turn into buyer’s regret, a huge, gaping hole in the budget, and a house full of random stuff if there’s no voice of reason (inside or outside of them) to help them solidify their ideas or clarify their spending goals.

Keywords: random, potential, ideas, relating, connecting.

Extroverted Intuitives (ENTPs and ENFPs) might really enjoy a chaotic trip to the mall where you run around to different stores and stay as long as you want. Thrift stores are also a great option. Not only are they cheaper—they also tend to have weirder, more unique items. Some activities that might be the most fun for these types are:

    • Discussing random topics triggered by all the things they encounter in the stores

    • Trying to find the most random thing possible (like a T-shirt of an opossum hugging a pizza or a purple monkey lamp)

    • Brainstorming ideas for how one could use an item such as an accessory or a tool (the object of interest varies depending on the individual and their unique interests), or imagine how the item would fit into one’s life (e.g. “This dress could be my party outfit!” or “I could add some excitement to my desk at work with this!”)  

    • Splitting off from friend groups to different parts of the store (especially if it’s maze-like) to visit different points of interest, and then regroup to share their findings (exploring is one of my favorite parts of shopping.)

There's a word for the Ne browsing experience I would like to highlight for a second here, and that is the word “random.” One of the greatest strengths of those with dominant Ne is creativity and idea generation, and there is a real desire for freedom to follow the current zing of` inspiration. If Ne is your preference, random might be the key to having more fun while you browse. Be random. Visit some new shops in some new places or go on a hunt for something weirdly specific and see if you can find it. Maybe you can find your Shop of Inspiration--a store that speaks to you somehow, and helps you start thinking outside the box again when you're in a rut.

Se (Extroverted Sensor) Browsing

It's always a good time...

Those with Se may have the most fun with shopping. As I mentioned before, stores almost always have something new. In American culture, I think much of the advertising efforts are geared towards these types. There’s so much focus on the new and trendy stuff nowadays that it’s no wonder we encounter strange things like people making fun of their friends for not having an iPhone. Everything is sensationalized and ramped up to the point of being exhausting. Movies are loud, vibrant, and energetic, while ads are constantly being shoved in our faces. The people who handle the madness of our modern world with the least amount of stress might be those with Se at the top of their functions stack. They are usually adaptive and can be very quick learners.

Keywords: freedom, impulse, experiencing, sensuous.

Since stores usually have so much going on inside them, Extroverted Sensors (ESTPs and ESFPs) would probably be energized just by the experience of being in the store alone, though friends add an extra layer of entertainment and excitement. Impulse buying would probably also be very appealing (maybe even a temptation). Some really fun activities for these types might be:

    • Letting their senses and instincts lead them around the store to help them find what they’re looking for specifically (or, if they’re just there for fun, to something that will entertain them)

    • Stopping to experience an item in the store, such as smelling a candle or feeling a soft pair of PJs (free samples or things with “Try Me” buttons can also be very entertaining)

    • Hiding from friends in an aisle and then jumpscaring them (I had an ESTP friend who would jump out at me all the time, she got a real kick out of it)

    • Trying on outfits and doing a mini-fashion show for their friends (Extroverted Intuitives often enjoy this activity too)

The best kind of browsing for Se dominants would likely fast-paced and exciting, to avoid boredom. Winging it while you shop may also feel right to you and bring confidence, but it’s really all about living in the moment. The more present-minded you are while browsing, the more fun you'll likely have. Obviously, it’s really just about doing it instead of thinking so hard about it.

Te (Extroverted Thinker) Browsing

Shopping with or without the list - pros and cons?

Te users often value efficiency, especially those with dominant Te. My dad, who is an INFP with well-developed Te, likes to go fast when shopping. Those with Te as their dominant function might be less inclined to window shop than other types (especially if there's not a purpose for the shopping and they have other things to get done), but that doesn’t mean they can’t enjoy it.  

Keywords: organized, optimized, fast, efficient.

Stores are usually not organized or efficient in structure, since they are trying to get you to buy something. Sometimes the aisles are too small and people block the way, or the store is super busy and the lines for the checkout end up being absurdly long. This sometimes makes shopping a bit of an annoyance, or even a huge drag. However, some shopping-related activities that could be fun for Te users are:

    • Organizing the shopping list

    • Coming up with strategies for the fastest way to get the needed items at the store

    • Making decisions on what will be the best brand and price to purchase

    • Checking off the list of needed items as they go

    • Looking around the store to see what could be improved (e.g. is the display over there doing a good job advertising its items? Is a product obscured, or difficult to access? Are prices easy to see, or are they hidden?)

    • Shopping for items that are needed to get something done or finish a project

I have not yet seen a dominant Te user using their topmost function to enjoy shopping (the things I listed didn’t sound like they were based on fun, but they might be fun, who knows?). And since Te is a decision-making function rather than an information gathering function, they would likely use Ni/Se (ENTJs) or Si/Ne (ESTJS) if they're shopping for the experience. I'm sure it would change also if they were shopping with a friend, rather than on their own.

If you are a Te user who likes to window shop and you wouldn’t mind sharing your experiences with me, please write me an email. I am very curious if my description was accurate, and about other ways the Te function shows up for shopping, and I would love to hear from you!

Fe (Extroverted Feeler) Browsing

They like puffy jackets, and their favorite color is yellow.

Fe, similar to Te, is also a decision-making function. However, Extroverted Feelers may enjoy window shopping more, especially if people are involved. They likely also use a combination of their dominant function paired with one of their information-gathering functions, such Ni/Se (ENFJs) or Si/Ne (ESFJs).

Dominant Extroverted Feelers (ENFJs and ESFJs) would likely prefer to shop with other people over shopping alone (unless they just need a break from their ever-active harmony empath radar). Some fun activities for Fe users might be:

    • Shopping specifically for an event, such as a birthday or holiday, where there are lots of fun traditions and individuals to consider (e.g. “My friend loves the color purple, and we’re throwing a surprise party for her after she comes home from her last semester of college.”)

    • Visiting stores with a friend just for fun (probably with at least a rough plan of action in mind) and going to the stores both people really enjoy (bonus points if the friend has a really great time)

    • Being friendly and trying to be helpful to others while at the store (helping a person reach something or find an item), and just generally trying to make other people around them feel happier

I’ve gone shopping with a few friends who have dominant Fe, and it was always a treat. Often, they would ask me for my opinion on different brands or items, which really made me feel important and valued as a person. I loved seeing their thoughtful kind of shopping where they would remember what others needed and treated others around them with respect and kindness. Their natural ability to harmonize with people made shopping with them tons of fun!

Browsing Instead of Buying

I think that simply browsing more often instead of buying can still fulfill an extrovert’s needs to for extroverted experiences, but without completely draining our bank accounts or filling our homes with clutter. It’s a win-win situation, and it can be lots of fun!

However, you may want to limit how often you window shop, since there the inherent risk of impulse buys (it's not all you, a big part of the problem is the marketing), and there is the price of gas to consider. It’s also really important to take the time to appreciate what you already have.

Before you drive to the shoe store, think about those many pairs of shoes in your closet. Many people in the world only have one pair of shoes, or none at all. If you have more than three, you are very blessed.

Before you decide to buy another phone, think about the one in your hand that you’ve only had for a year. Not everyone has access to the technology you do. Are you using it wisely? Are you grateful you have it? I’m grateful for my phone. Some people genuinely believe that you have to have an iPhone (the latest one), and an at least newer car model, or you’re just bonkers crazy. Maybe they think of it like a software update--why not have the newest version? Isn't the newest stuff the best? I personally don’t like iPhones, I am perfectly content with my Moto E5 Go. Every time I turn it on, it says, “Hello Moto”, which never fails to amuse me. I can use that phone to do some pretty amazing things too, even change my own life, or another person’s life.

You really don't need much to change the world for the better, just the desire to do so.

New isn’t wrong, not at all! It’s okay to want something new to freshen things up. However, what do you appreciate about the things in your life that you do have? What little thing about something you own makes you smile or laugh? Maybe you like the lopsided appearance of a childhood stuffed animal or the funky, lightning-bolt shaped scratch on your scooter. Maybe you’ll even find something new about what you already have that you didn’t notice.

Whether we’re an extrovert or an introvert, I think sometimes we get caught up in chasing after the things we don’t have, instead of taking the time to appreciate what we do have. Sometimes we even focus more on things than on our family, our friends, our relationships. Let’s start being more grateful that we live in such a blessed country and are able to shop at all, and that we have people to shop with. That is the secret to the true joy of window shopping.

Tags: AllExtroverts, ConceptsTheory, AllPosts